Sad Day

So yesterday 8/9, my English Bulldog, Buddy passed away unexpectedly. I am devastated. He was eight years old, to be nine in December. He didn’t have any health issues, except for the occasional allergies and mites. This is what happened:

We were getting ready to go on vacation, heading to Vermont, which is where we are right now. We packed up our things and took our beloved Bulldog Buddy and our Cairn Terrier, Zoe. We had the air on because it’s summer and bulldogs are always hot and overheated. We stopped halfway through, which the trip total was 4.5 hours. We let the dogs out to do their business and we gave them both water to drink. Buddy seemed fine at this point.

Towards the last stretch of our trip to Vermont, something went wrong it seemed. Buddy started to pant hard and was even making a gasping sound. We just thought maybe it was normal, because he’s a bulldog and he has breathing issues. Especially when we go on trips. He gets high anxiety because he doesn’t know where he’s going.

Anyway we arrive in Vermont and at the vacation spot that we are staying and he seems like he’s panting A LOT! I have seen him pant before, but this was too much. He was making a whistling sound and he sounded upset, like he was whimpering. He couldn’t catch his breath at all. I tried to give him water, he would drink, but then he would just throw it up. His tongue would turn purple in and out. My husband and I had no idea what to do. We decided it was time to call a vet in the area. We spoke to someone on call and they said to give him Benadryl and that it was normal. This did not seem NORMAL. He couldn’t breath. The nearest 24/7 hospital for animals was 2 hours away! Can you believe that, two hours! How do they not have any emergency vets close? It boggles my mind. In PA where I live, there are two hospitals for animals in a 10 min vicinity.

So anyway, we tried giving him water and the Benadryl, which we finally were able to give him. All of a sudden his legs gave out and he couldn’t walk. That’s when we knew something serious happened. We searched online and saw there was a “supposed” 24/7 vet right down the road, and we drove there. Buddy was panting heavily in the back seat and I was trying to call the hospital to tell them we were on our way. The woman told us that they were closed and was going to call the on call doctor. I’m like freaking out because the website said 24/7 care. Unfortunately the doctor was away some three hours away. Not his fault, but he was the one that said he was fine and that he should just take Benadryl.

We figured Buddy was going to be okay. His breathing slowed, but I watched him. His breathing started to deepen, like he was trying to gasp for breath. Next think you know, he just stopped breathing.

I told my husband to pull over. We got out of the car and shook him, but nothing. He was gone. We freaked out and cried. We even tried to do mouth to mouth, but there was nothing we could do. He wasn’t waking up. My baby boy was gone.

Not many of you know this, but Buddy was baby. He was the light in my life. I loved him more than life itself. I’m writing this with tears in my eyes. I just can’t believe he’s gone. He was a mama’s boy as well. He was always by my side. He was a character, and had the best personality. I feel like a huge chunk of my heart was taken away from me when he died.

We took him back to the house that we are staying out and buried his body. I wanted to take him back home and bury him at home, but that was impossible to do. We did what we had to do. We said our goodbyes and I cried the whole day yesterday. I’m still crying and so far it’s a shitty vacation. I still can’t believe that he’s gone. I feel like I’m still in shock. I know he lived a good life, and he was loved, but it’s still hard. I’ll never forget him. RIP Buddy, I love you more than words could ever express!

I just wanted to share this story, because I needed to vent! Thanks for listening.

M.

Time Flies…

Hey everyone! I know it’s been awhile since I wrote anything. I feel like life is flashing before my eyes. I’m always at the show or I’m at work or I’m writing. I never get the chance to just be if you know what I mean. I was able to get a few yoga classes in which I was ecstatic about because my back has been killing me from sitting on those bar stools that are in the play. 

It’s a beautiful day out here in PA and I’m stuck inside listening to the sound of the phone ringing. At least I have my radio to keep me company. Hope everyone is enjoying there Wednesday wherever you are. 

I had this strange thing that hit me the other day. I was sitting at a red light waiting to turn left, when I see this guy pull up next to me but he was a few cars ahead of me and he just flat out gave someone the finger. Not me! But someone. As the light turned green and I’m turning I’m thinking what has become of today’s society. They just don’t care about other people or what they think. I know sometimes it’s good to not care about what other people think but giving someone the finger when there could be a child sitting there and they’re probably thinking, hey mommy what does this mean, as they’re flipping their mommy the bird. Okay I laughed after I said that but still….is it okay to curse the f word in front of little ones or belittle someone right in front of their children or parent? I don’t know why that got to me. I’m not by any stretch innocent but it just had me thinking. 

Today I was driving to work and I see this big dog standing on the sidewalk by herself and she was looking at me. I’m like what the hell, where is this doggies owner. It was a she, because she did have a pink collar on. I wanted to stop but she was huge and I was heading to work. Hopefully that doggie found its way back home. However if it was a puppy, damn right I’m going to stop! I’m a sucker for puppies. 

To finish off my rant please take the time and check out my novel Braver Than Yesterday on Amazon and on Barnes & Noble. I’m currently in the editing process of my new novel From Within so it’s coming.

Much love everyone!

M. 

Another Day

I dont really know what to write about today. I’m just kind of bored and I’m actually at my parents house and hearing them bicker. I try not to laugh but I can’t help it, I guess that’s what happens when you’re married for so many years. I’ve only been married 2 and a half years and we fight like that already, hahaha I guess it is what it is. 

I did a lot of cleaning today at my house, my many animals are destroying my house but I still love them so much, especially my bulldog, he’s the cutest thing and he has the greatest personality. 

I didn’t get to do any writing these past few days because I’ve just been in a funk and also when I do sit down to write something comes up and I’m not able to. I am however definitely enjoying how this book is going. 

I made a new playlist for my jogging workout which I really like, when I hear it I get really excited and can’t wait to workout. I feel like it gives me some energy and it makes me happy. Have you ever had that happen when you hear a song you just light up and you feel the energy inside your body? Totally love that feeling.

 Okay I’m done for the evening, hope everyone has a great night! Cheers to it almost being the weekend!

M.