Catching up

Its been awhile since I’ve wrote anything on my blog so I wanted to do some catching up. The year is about to end. It’s crazy how fast the year went.

It was a year ago about a week ago since I published my first novel Braver Than Yesterday (formerly known as Not Alone). I’ve had such a wonderful time experiencing everything that had to do with the writing. Whether it was from the book signings that took place this year to even finishing my second novel From Within. I feel so blessed to have this gift of creativity bestowed upon me. I always wanted to do writing but I was always afraid to dabble with it.

This year I also took a writing course to brush up on skills. It was very informative and interesting. I enjoyed writing stories in the class. I wrote my very first short story and felt compelled to send it to some magazines but have yet to hear from them. It’s all good though, at least I tried.

Also this year I got a second job to help out with bills, which actually hasn’t been too bad. I don’t mind it really.

I lost my grandfather this year which was really sad. I will sure miss him.

There were some health scares in my family but nothing major so that’s good.

In the coming year I’m hoping for some new things. I’m hoping to pick up an agent for my novels. I’m hoping to complete at least two novels this year.

I also would love to expand my family this year. So we’ll see what happens with that. I’m ready for 2018 to be the best year yet. How about you?

 

Some fun..

Hey there everyone! So I wanted to let y’all know that I decided to try something with my book on Amazon which is called Braver Than Yesterday. I decided for a limited time to do a promotion where the kindle version is free. So if you want to take a look at it please do! This is my very first novel and I’m so excited about it.

I finally wrapped up my second novel but I didn’t put it out there yet because it’s still in the process of editing and also I’m trying to look for an agency that will take me under their wing, which let me tell you is not easy. My second novel is very different then the first one but I absolutely love it. Right now I’m actually working on the sequel to the second novel and while writing that book I’m currently gathering ideas and writing a completely different book. So the thoughts and ideas are coming at me and it’s been a lot of fun.

In other news: rehearsals are still going on and it’s a lot of work but it’s interesting. We finally received the schedules for when we will be on. There are a total of 16 shows and I will be in 12 of them because there are A and B casts. I am really busy these days but that’s a good thing. Just have to make time for working out in between.

So anyway please check out my novel Braver Than Yesterday on kindle for a limited time for free!! I would appreciate it. If you read it please leave a review, it helps! Thanks y’all!

M.

Down..

I know it’s been a few days since I wrote about my rehearsal experience. Thursday night was canceled so I didn’t have anything to report and my weekend was just crazy. So I’ll start with Friday night:

So I’m really excited because they started placing people in spots and where they put me was directly in center. I’m like okay this is great, I’m where all the action is. They didn’t tell me what I should be doing, so I just sat there. You would think they would be like, “Hey can you look at the actors that are talking on stage or hey can you act like your the stenographer,” which that’s what was I assigned. So we go through the rehearsal a few times and finally it’s time to go home and I was beat. Granted I did have a glass of wine before rehearsal because hey it’s Friday and I worked all day and wanted to have some downtime. Anyway I was excited because I was down in the center. Until the next day…

Saturday comes and we have rehearsal from 2 to 6. I’m kind of excited because you know my part is in the front where all the action is. So we sign in and we get started and they told us to get in our places and we do. We sit down and all of a sudden they say, “I want to make some changes. You get in the back.” Which they were referring to me. I was so disappointed and pissed off. They never gave me a reason why they moved me. So I went from front row to all the way in the back where you can’t even see me. Needless to say I was feeling pretty pissed off and it hurt a little but I guess that shit happens.

Sunday comes and I’m dreading to go. We have to be there from 11-6 and it was going to be a long day. I knew going in there that it was going to blow. A million times I wanted to get up and walk out and thought hey they is BS. Oh I forgot to mention, Saturday night I emailed the assistant director asking why I was moved and he never emailed me back. I was waiting on Sunday to see if he would say anything to me but nothing ever came. When lunch break came I was steaming, I needed a drink and yes I had one. Maybe I’m acting like a child I don’t know but I was just so mad. My husband was telling me that I’m making a big deal out of it and that it wasn’t personal, but to be honest it felt personal. Especially if they didn’t even give me a reason. If I was doing something wrong I really would’ve liked to know so I could’ve fixed it. But hey maybe that’s the acting world.

After that weekend I’ve been feeling depressed. My book isn’t selling and I haven’t heard from any agents regarding my book. I try to not get discouraged but come on, I feel like I’m having all these bad things that aren’t going my way so it’s hard to stay positive. I love to write it’s my passion but sometimes I sit and think why am I here on this earth, is there a purpose? Sorry I’m just venting. I’ll stop here. Thanks for listening!

M.

In My Mind..

I have to be honest, I’m comfortable in my own skin. I really hate talking about this and even put this out there for the world to see but I feel like I let myself go-and not in a good way. I mean with weight gain. I feel gross–mind you I’m not overweight but I could stand to lose about 20 lbs but I don’t really know how to go about doing it. I feel like I’m getting lazy and it doesn’t help that I have a job where I sit all day. I do however, do yoga a few times a week but that’s not enough. I used to jog but my knee was really bothering me so I had to stop. I started to just walk but then I got bored with it. I just received an elliptical from my mom that’s actually hers but she had no room for it so she lent it to me. So far so good with that. I’ll tell you a little bit about myself when it comes to weight.

I was always a pretty skinny person, not extremely skinny. I was a little curvy I guess you can say. But when I started going through puberty I started to gain weight and then I started smoking cigarettes and I a lost a few but nothing really to write home about. It wasn’t until I turned 16 that I got my tonsils out and I lost all weight and I was fairly thin. I weighed about 125 and then I went down to 110. I kept it off for a long time and I was really self conscious about myself. I felt like I had to workout constantly but all I had back then was an elliptical and I used to do that thing like a few times a day. That was how I kept the weight off. I was still smoking to keep myself skinny and to keep my anxiety in check. I started having all these stomach issues and I didn’t know why. I thought I was too young to be dealing with something like that so I went to a gastro doctor and it turned out I had IBS. It’s not a big deal but I ended up going gluten free. I know a lot of people think that’s a joke and it does nothing for you but for me it was a god send. After I stopped eating gluten I felt better, like a million times better. I had all this energy and my face cleared up and the best part I wasn’t having stomach issues anymore. People thought I was nuts but hey I didn’t care what people thought, it worked for me.

So fast forward a few years I met my husband and I quit smoking. He’s the complete opposite then me when it comes to food. I was trying and trying to stay gluten free but with him it was hard. He wanted things that I couldn’t have. I’m not saying it was his fault, I should’ve been stronger. I gave up and started eating gluten but a miraculous thing happened, I felt cured. I could eat anything I wanted and I was fine. The problem was I was starting to eat like shit. No more salads and now I was eating bread. When I was gluten free I didn’t have any pasta or bread. It was a few years before I had any of that stuff. My go to meal when I was gluten free was rice and tuna. Not together lol that would’ve been disgusting. I can’t even look at tuna the same way again, I can eat it in a hoagie but in a can: forget it. I ate so much, it was the best thing in the world to me. It was the one thing that I couldn’t part with. So anyway sorry I went off track, my weight started to go up. It was very slow because my metabolism was pretty fast. I think it still is but not as fast as when I was in my 20’s. Now fast forward a few years and I’m living at home with my husband and I feel like shit. Mind you I don’t eat fast food, I think that’s disgusting but I like hoagies and pizza and things like that so that doesn’t help. I don’t feel like working out anymore andI just sit on the couch.

As I sit here today, I’m like pissed at myself for doing this to myself. I shouldn’t be eating take out all the time. It’s definitely not healthy but money plays a huge role in why we don’t actually have food in the house which is another story that I won’t get in. I used to have abs and I felt so healthy and I was a size two and now forget that, I feel like shit and I’m like a size 6. What the hell happened? I have to make some changes and soon because at this rate depression is going to take over.

I apologize for the rant but thank you for reading.

M.